Wednesday 21 September 2011

i feel like an idiot


I feel like an idiot...it seems like I’m the only one who wants to show my affection and care towards the other. The other, doesn’t seem to care my whereabouts, whether I’m home safe, whether I’m sick or not, whether it is okay for me to drive long hours to a place I’ve never been and arrive safely, whether I need the other to comfort me, to give encouragement to what I’m doing, give support to my decision, console me when I’m mad or sad... pat my head so I feel better...I longed to have all these...am I asking too much? I think not...if I can make effort, so does the other...it’s either you want to make effort or not...it shows how much you care...I’m not asking for a diamond ring, or a Porsche...I’m asking for an sms, ask me where I am, ask me how I’ve been, ask me whether I’m okay if I send messages that sound like I need you, ask me if you feel that I’m sick...am I the only one who’s feeling all this for you? I can feel it when you ‘re sick, I can feel it when you feel sad,  can feel it when you need a shoulder to cry on, I can feel it when you’re lonely, I can feel everything that you are feeling...but why not you? When your friends left you alone, it was me whom you turn to...you even said that I’m your best friend...and now, when your friends came back, you throw me away... You seemed to have abandoned the feelings that you have for me, your attachments towards me seems to vaporize...sooner, and it will all be gone...at that moment, sorry does seem to be the hardest word...

2 comments:

  1. Salam,

    Hope I don't sound like a busybody but a relationship is a 50-50 thing. You pull your weight, he has to pull his. If you're doing all the work, then it seems he's taking your feelings for granted because you've been together for so long.

    Maybe you should have a calm talk with him to make him understand your frustrations (I'm guessing he doesn't read your blog). It is really his own loss for not paying more attention to you because you're a great girl and it sounds like you deserve more than what he's giving you at the moment.

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  2. salam,
    we have talked the talk and it seems that both understands what need to be done..hopefully he would understand and remember what we talked about and not to repeat the same thing again...the thing is, at certain times,I too did, silly things that i thought is ok to him... but the post is something about what he didn't do at times when i want him to..most of the times, he does show his compassion...it's just that for that particular week he seems to ignore my emotions and i found out that he has family matters to attend to...yes, i know a relationship is a 50-50 thing and a talk is very important and i hope we can continue this discussion thing between us (me and him) until we tie the knot and our life together after wards...thank you so much for your concern...and yes, he doesn't read my blog..

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